Are You a Fish Out of Water

Feeling Anxious? You might just be a “Fish Out of Water”.  

When we talk about anxiety, it’s easy to focus only on the symptoms—feeling tense, racing thoughts, trouble sleeping, or even physical signs like a racing heart. But there’s a deeper question that can often provide clarity and help us move forward:

Is this anxiety primary, or is it secondary?

In other words—are you living, working, or studying in an environment that doesn’t suit your natural personality or way of thinking/cognition? 

Sometimes, anxiety isn’t the core issue—it’s a signal. A red flag telling you that something about your surroundings or daily routine just doesn’t “fit” with who you are.  Maybe your personality thrives on calm and connection, but you’re stuck in a high-pressure, competitive environment. Or perhaps you’re someone who values structure and detail, but your job requires constant flexibility and chaos. 

This kind of mismatch between who you are and the world around you can cause a chronic, unhealthy level of stress.

When we explore anxiety through this lens, it becomes less about “what’s wrong with me?” or about “what’s wrong around me?” but more about where is the mismatch.  This shift in perspective can be empowering. It can help you:

1. Understand your stress from a new angle. 
2. Make clearer decisions about your environment and lifestyle. 
3. Create or seek out spaces that better support your natural strengths and values. 

Over time, finding or creating a better-fitting context—whether it’s a change in the type of work, relationships, or daily rhythm—can dramatically reduce anxiety and improve overall well-being.

So if you’re feeling anxious, it might be worth asking: Am I just a fish out of water? 

And if the answer is yes, it’s not a flaw—it’s a sign. A sign that it’s time to explore new waters where you can thrive.