A short letter to all the perfectionists of the world

To all the perfectionists of the world,

I often come across many of my patients who are perfectionistic in nature, and that is not necessarily a bad thing.  In actual fact, it is a great thing!  We should all have and thrive for high standards.

However, my statement comes with a few conditions:

1. A perfectionist who is self critical and fear failure, can be extremely self destructive.
2. A perfectionist who is self critical, fear failure, but have lots of skills, will get away with it until the day, when they are faced with a situation where they do not have the skills e.g. in parenting and relationships.
3. A perfectionist who is self compassionate, self reflective, but not self critical, and who understands that failures and mistakes are pathways to success, will go a long way.

So if you are a perfectionist, please celebrate it, be kind to yourself, and embrace your failures just like when you play Angry Birds.  If you are good at it, then I know that you have made at least a few mistakes along the way.

I wish you all the very best.

Kind regards,
Dr Vin